If you are a late diagnosed autistic and/or ADHDer, you may discover a very odd comment being thrown your way that will have you questioning everything:
“You didn’t used to act this autistic/ADHD”.
You’ll stop, look at your actions and wonder “fuck… Am I faking all this because I’ve been diagnosed?”
No. No you are not.
What you are experiencing (and what they are seeing) is known as unmasking.
Diagnosis (for many late diagnosed adults) is a long sought after answer. Before diagnosis we often suppress all our needs, including stimming, hyperactivity, difficulties concentrating, force ourselves to go out, socialise etc.
Diagnosis is the first time we feel we have permission to not kill ourselves for the sake of a 2 hour dinner party. And we say “no, thank you” or we stim more to concentrate or cope instead of holding it all in.
And NT people see that and say “this is different. People don’t change unless something is wrong with them. So, something is wrong with what they’re doing.”
But there is nothing wrong with unmasking. It’s scary, sometimes necessary… But it’s never wrong.
Being asexual is like you have to do that experiment they sometimes do with kids where there’s a marhsmallow in front of you but you’re not allowed to eat it until they say so and if you succeed you get another one, and you’re told that eating the marshmallow early is evil and sinful and if you eat it you should be ashamed but then you’re like hm I don’t want the marshmallow at all and then they get mad because apparently you’re supposed to be filled with an insatiable hunger for marshmallows otherwise there’s something wrong with you
fuck it!! reblog this and say one (1) (or more if you want to) nice thing about the person you reblogged this from. it can literally be about anything– just spread some positivity and make this hellsite just a little more bearable!
